Fellowship with other believers

[MrB]

First, define fellowship; friendly association, especially with people who share one's interests.
For longer term friendly association there needs to be common interest.
Must haves... some common interest.
Must not haves... strong anti-biblical, or hostile to Christian values.

The definition of what constitutes fellowship with others?
For me what a dictionary says doesn’t mean much compared with what you actually do.
I think only the individual can define what fellowship is for them and then what it’s means for their family etc
I would like it if you took the time to tell us what your definition is ,it Will most likely be different from what I do and help me refine my thoughts around this.
For some it’s deeply personal for others it’s nothing of consequence.
How does fellowship take place for you? With who? Are you intentional with it , or dose it just happen with all and anyone?

 

[RealmUncertain]

Must confess Jesus and have some visible "fruit." Must not be intentionally living in sin.

To some people Polygyny is sin. The issue of sin is also a interesting one. What is sin?

- Violation of the law (Torah) - Romans 4:15
- Missing the mark. In this case what is the mark? - Romans 3:23
- Not doing what you know to do - James 4:17
- Anything not of faith - Romans 14 : 23
- Not walking in love

I had this discussion with a pastor who was convinced Polygyny was a sin, based on Genesis. To him sin was falling short of Gods ideal based on Romans 3:23. And Gods ideal is life long monogamy according to Genesis. Only problem is by his definition the whole of our church is in the perpetual sin of gluttony, we sure ate a lot during church picnics. And we ate meat, pork and all other kinds of unhealthy things that am sure is definitely not Gods ideal.

To be honest it is difficult to legislate these matters. I find that Christian sometimes do better at fellowship with non-believers than believers.

By the way I had a call with my friend. I was able to talk to him about the whole situation. We are now on good terms, I think we have a gentleman agreement to leave the whole issue alone for the sake of the friendship.

Question to all that would answer.
What qualifications are needed to fellowship with you?
Do you have any “must haves”, or “must not haves” when you consider fellowship?

But I also will like to get an answer from some people here regarding this. What are the boundaries of inclusion and exclusion for this community.
Perhaps hard boundaries don't apply, but are there general guides for conduct one should know about before hand?

 

[Joleneakamama]

To some people Polygyny is sin. The issue of sin is also a interesting one. What is sin?

Some may ignorantly think polygyy is sin. Some are gender confused too but we dont pretend their position is valid or changes the truth.
To be able to correct someone like we are instructed to in the following verse, you need to be able to SHOW THEM where they are outside if what YHWH has authorized.

Matthew 18:15-17
"Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican."

Without being able to show someone in black and white where they are wrong, all you have is your own stupid, fallible, mortal, perhaps ignorant, certainly NOT divine, OPINION.

My sisterwife is not my daughter, granddaughter, or my husband's former sister in law. There is no other law about who he can marry that they can bring.

- Violation of the law (Torah) - Romans 4:15
- Missing the mark. In this case what is the mark? - Romans 3:23
- Not doing what you know to do - James 4:17
- Anything not of faith - Romans 14 : 23
- Not walking in love

Out of that list there are only some violations of the law that directly impact others ("trespass against thee") and those are the sins we can and should confront others with. ...first privately, then with witnesses, BEFORE breaking fellowship.
The other matters are basically between the individual and Yeshua/Jesus. It is the Holy Spirit that convicts hearts and changes lives.

To be honest it is difficult to legislate these matters. I find that Christian sometimes do better at fellowship with non-believers than believers.

Maybe because it is not our place to legislate, only call people out on what we are aware of as it relates to us personally.
We have experienced the same thing with other believers. I think part of the problem is people thinking too much of their own opinion or position, and trying to enforce their PERSONAL preferences (including monogamy) on others as if their will is equal to His law.
With non believers there is less crossing lines and trying to claim authority where there really is none.

Edited to add that fellowship is with others we treat as "equals" (redeemed sinners walking in faith) while most Christians also interact with others who are not redeemed as well. The interactions with the others is more like evangelizing and it is offensive when Christians refuse fellowship...but continue "outreach" with your children.

 

[RealmUncertain]

Matthew 18:15-17
"Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican."

I actually like this definition of sin. So its relational, which means there are

-> Sins against Gods (law)
-> Sins against Humans
-- Sins against human laws (the government, the church)
-- Sins against another human feelings and opinions.

I guess this is where the issue arises. This means that sin can only really be defined within a community context. i.e. what the community adheres to a prior. In which case perhaps it is right to get kicked out of church for talking about polygyny
The real tragedy is how it happened that there is almost no widespread christian community doing what the Bible teaches about male and female relationships. I wonder what is the real reason for this?

 

[Joleneakamama]

guess this is where the issue arises. This means that sin can only really be defined within a community.

Sin can really only be defined by YHWH. It is He who sets the moral limits of human sexuality and tells us how to show respect others.
People make lotsa rules...additional burdens...some which actually make the law of God of no effect. If a man seduces a maid he shall surely endow her to be his wife.....unless he is married already? Yeah...PEOPLE changed that one and no longer require men be responsible for sleeping with her.

Sins against another human feelings and opinions.

Offending someone by disagreeing with their opinion is not sin.

The real tragedy is how it happened that there is almost no widespread christian community doing what the Bible teaches about male and female relationships. I wonder what is the real reason for this?

The reason is people started acting like going against the opinions of mere mortal men....(catholic pope and bishops) was sin.
The council said if anyone says it is lawful for a man to have more than one wife...and that this is NOT AGAINST SCRIPTURE let him be anathema.

 

[Mojo]

People make lotsa rules...additional burdens...some which actually make the law of God of no effect.

Bingo!

 

[The Revolting Man]

Question to all that would answer.
What qualifications are needed to fellowship with you?
Do you have any “must haves”, or “must not haves” when you consider fellowship?

Fellowship is controlled by Acts 15. Having a teaching or leadership role is a much tougher standard.

 

[frederick]

I would like it if you took the time to tell us what your definition is

That's why I started with a definition. Fellowship means different things to different people so I began quoting a definition from an online dictionary. I don't fellowship with people when there are zero common interests.

 

[RealmUncertain]

Sin can really only be defined by YHWH. It is He who sets the moral limits of human sexuality and tells us how to show respect others.

I actually agree with you totally. This is the only way it can work. Sin against God can only be decided against what God explicitly says in his laws. And if we are going to make up new laws, it should not be way more restrictive than the ones God originally setup.

I think the church adopted a policy of taking the highest level of restriction possible in the case of sexuality. So celibacy becomes the highest form of sexual morality, and sex within marriage a necessary inconvenience for procreation. Don't misunderstand me am not advocating licentiousness and I still believe sex should be bounded in committed relationships but I can speak from experience to say that this level of rigidity has twisted people just as much as casting off restraint.

Few weeks ago, at my messianic place the speaker went on and on about how he loves food, he even turned to the resident pastor and said am sure you love food as much as I do. He went one and on and on about food with vivid descriptions. Since looking into Biblical sexuality I have become quite sensitive to lots of things.

I began thinking, why is he so comfortable talking about the love of food from the pulpit. Does he not realize that there is something said in the New Testament about gluttony. Am not judging him but I wondered what if someone went on and on about sex that way. We would all think there is something wrong with him.

The approach of basing sin on explicitly stated law is the only sane way to go in my opinion.

 

[frederick]

According to Romans 3:20, it is through the law we have the knowledge of sin, and 1 John 3:4 tells us sin is lawlessness. If God doesn't give us some clear command or instruction regarding a matter, we ought to be very careful before declaring it a sin. Even God Himself appealed to His commandment when He confronted Adam and Eve in the Garden. It's a divinely established principle, so we shouldn't deviate from it.

 

[Mojo]

If you use fellowship to mean acquaintances, friends, moose lodge members, political party associates, etc then I would feel comfortable fellowshipping with a whole host of people, including Hindus, Muslims, atheists and pagans. Good conversation is good conversation.

When it comes to who I worship with, that’s a lot more sensitive and selective. I would feel most comfortable with Apostles Creed believers. Eschatology means nothing to me. Id have to get to know the folks in a congregation but I’d be willing to consider other doctrines on a case by case basis. If they agree to let me hold my beliefs then it’s easier to associate